My body feels tense. It's like I'm waiting for the moment the needle breaks the skin. Anticipation of pain you know you can tolerate, that you'll get through. Or.. maybe my fucking period is coming and I'm starting to temporarily lose it like I do every month. I gotta find a better way to control my crazy. Sometimes I allow it to eat at me until I burst and end up doing something drastic.
I think about my best friend, how she felt compelled to show up to this guy's job because she was so in love with him and she had to explain to him how she felt because he broke up with her. Honestly I don't think they were really together. It was a Cancer falling for the wrong one at the end of the day.
God I hope it is my period and not intuition. The difference is, I will wait this time because my final move is my last. I hope he proves me wrong. I'm glad the wait is over at least. I'll finally know if my husband really is mine.
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